I struggle with not being confident enough. That might seem like a strange thing to hear from someone who actually has spoken more than 3000 times to groups sometimes into the thousands. You may think I am kidding as a person who built a business from nothing to an organization that works with hundreds of thousands of people and is still growing. You might also think that I’m just saying I lack confidence to make a point.
Well, you would be both wrong and right. I do want to make a point but I am also very worried about outside “things”. Opinions matter to me and other people’s feelings of me matter. I am a people pleaser; I just want everyone to like me, or at least not dislike me.
So I guess this is a fairly open and honest piece. I know where it comes from. I come from a divorced family. My parents divorced when I was young, 12 or 13. I was forced into a caretaker role for my mom. I would literally do anything to make her happy. To take away her sadness. I just want people to be happy, not sad.
I never was an academic. I never graduated high school. I enrolled in college as a mature student and was later tossed. I don’t have a fancy degree or even a practical diploma. I have always felt less educated than those around me. I know I am worldly, travelled, and I enjoy reading (even though I didn’t when I was a teen). So I guess I always feel as if I need to work harder to “prove” or “justify” my success.
These are very real and very authentic emotions. I am currently writing this on a flight coming home from Brussels, sitting in the first class cabin (thank you points). I will be home in about 8 hours from now. I will pull into the home that I share with the MOST wonderful person in the world. My Jenny (Forest Gump reference). I won the partner contest. I hope if you are in a relationship you feel you have won too.
Tomorrow I will go visit the office that I found, built and love. I will be with a group of STUpendous humans that work hard every day to change the next generation in a positive way. To inspire youth and educators. To support parents and help build young leaders that care and do more than they think they can. I am MOSTLY blessed to say that they believe in what I, and in turn we are trying to accomplish.
I am from a different generation than the current. I don’t post most of what we do on social media. We try to keep our presence known. But, at the end fo the day we simply try and make a difference. In the
actual work we do.
So, what am I trying to say? I guess, I am desperate to say that I am ok. I can’t please everyone. Everyone has right to their own opinion of me, even if it isn’t right. I can honestly say I don’t think I would have had the courage to do what I did had “BRAG MEDIA” existed in the nineties. I didn’t know how uneducated and under-qualified I was to do what I did. I only had my blind optimism that everything would work out. It had to. I didn’t have a contingency plan. I didn’t know what one was.
So for anyone who feels like me, not-good-enough. Unable to please everyone. It’s ok. It’s natural. I know.
But I, like you NEED to get over it. Need to forget the haters and people that judge and especially those that keep score. I have always said, those that keep score in life, lose.
You and I deserve to be proud of what we do or what we want to do.
Who knew that a high school drop out would go on and build
YLCC, something that is BIGGER than me? Bigger than one person.
PS (BEFORE I SIGN OFF).
I am going to boast a bit here…
YLCC has some of the BEST Leadership Programs and Conferences on the PLANET! I hope to connect with you at one of these!
As 2018 is wrapping up, we have a some IMPORTANT deadlines!
YLCC Alumni
Summer Camp Registration (Camp is 73% full) - December 1, 2018
OSLC 2019 Alumni Registration (OSLC41 is 90% full) - December 15, 2018
BC Student Leadership Seminars Early Bird - December 31, 2018
GSLS 2020 Eager Leader - December 21, 2018
SPARK Leadership Conferences @ Canada’s Wonderland Early Bird - December 31, 2018
OSLC Spring 4 - Early Bird Registration - February 9, 2019
I hope to see you at one of our AMAZING, STUpendous programs in the NEW year!
Here’s to a strong finish for 2018 and an even better, more confident 2019 for all of us!
