At Caron, we understand the apprehension around entering treatment during the holidays. We have successfully guided numerous individuals and families through this difficult decision. We understand that while being there for the holidays may seem important, beginning the path to healing and ending the chaos of addiction is life-changing, if not life-saving.

Below is a guide to how we’ve helped individuals understand why now is a better time than ever to begin their Recovery journey.

“My family needs me here.”
Think about previous holidays or family gatherings – has your substance use disorder added to or taken from the joy of the season? It might feel like your family needs you, but the reality is, do they really want you there if you are drunk or high? Your family does not want the little bits of you that are left after your drug or alcohol use. They need you to be healthy, happy and whole. They need you to be on a positive path of physical, mental and spiritual health.

It’s probably more accurate to say that you need your family during this time, but you can’t be fully present for them if the distraction of drugs or alcohol is in the mix. The best thing you can give yourself and your family at this time of year is the gift of Recovery.
  
“I will miss out on our family’s traditions.”
For many families, holidays are about traditions and creating memories. When you’re struggling, going through the motions of your traditions will be difficult and, ultimately, lead to feelings of shame, sadness or embarrassment if you’re under the influence, which may serve as a trigger to use even more. Are these the kinds of memories you want to create?

Your family traditions can be celebrated at any time of year, but the disease of addiction is unpredictable, so you can’t postpone getting well any longer. The truth is that a decision to seek and sustain Recovery will benefit everyone’s holiday experience. Think of the pride and relief your family members will have once they see how far you have come in Recovery. That’s an occasion worth celebrating!

For those whose faith traditions more richly inform their holidays, a different kind of urgency can be felt. For individuals who are in treatment over faith holidays at Caron find meaningful ways to have their observances and be in contact with loved ones at home. Sometimes, the greatest gift we can give is our absence in one year that makes possible our improved presence in years to come.  

“Being in treatment is not where I want to be during the holiday season.”
How do you envision your holidays going if you do not seek help? When you’re struggling, worry, arguments, disappointment, shame and isolation overshadow holiday functions. Caron offers a safe place for you to gain strength in Recovery. You’ll be immersed with others who are new to this way of celebrating, and you'll have the guidance and support to help you begin new traditions and celebrate the holidays in a healthy way.

“I will seek treatment AFTER the holidays; now is just not a good time.”
Addiction is a progressive, deadly disease that can be treated. Last year more than 200,000 people died as a result of alcohol use or from a drug overdose. Office parties, family gatherings, and other holiday-related events will put you at risk; even just one last binge or blackout could be extremely detrimental to your health. By entering treatment, you'll gain the tools you'll need to navigate these occasions in a healthy, sober way. In addition, taking advantage of the lighter workloads that often accompany the holidays, school vacations, paid time off that many companies offer and annual insurance deductibles allow you greater flexibility now than after the New Year begins.

 

“I would never put my loved one in treatment during the holidays!”
Ask yourself: How have previous holidays been? Do you recall worrying about if and when your loved one would arrive? Was he or she drunk or high? Did you have feelings of shame, anger or embarrassment about his or her behavior?

If the answer is yes to any of the above, going through this again, or possibly something worse, can really put a damper not only on your holiday season, but on those around you. While your loved one may initially feel resentful, their treatment experience will help them embark on a journey of gratitude and an ongoing healthy lifestyle in the hopes that future holiday gatherings will be peaceful and create lasting, meaningful memories. 

“I will be worried about my loved one. I can monitor them while they’re home for the holidays, and they won’t use while the family is around.”
Substance use disorder does not limit where and when a person will use, let alone who they are around. Someone who wants to use can do so in plain sight, even if it’s when they are running a quick errand or using the restroom. Do you want to spend your holiday being on edge, feeling the need to watch your loved one’s every move? Or would you rather have the peace of mind that your loved one is in a safe environment with a supportive clinical team beginning the process of Recovery? 

“How will I explain my loved one’s absence to others?”
Ask yourself how it feels to explain the negative behaviors associated with your loved one’s substance use disorder. Is that how you want to feel this holiday season?

You control how much you want to share regarding your loved one’s absence. It is important to remember when your loved one is in treatment, they are receiving medical care for the disease of substance use disorder. If you do share, you often will find others who have faced similar struggles and you may find empathy in sharing your experience. You may also keep it simple and say that your loved one is receiving medical care or taking time for themselves.

“My child is home from college on winter break, so we'll have this time for him to receive treatment.”
Using a holiday break to enter treatment has many advantages, including not missing class time. However, it is important to know that treatment is often just the beginning of the Recovery journey. The first months, and even years, of sobriety require continued and intensive work. Caron can help support your child’s new lifestyle, allowing them to build life skills to have a successful, healthy college experience and beyond.

Senior Coordinator of Caron's Education Alliance and Family Education Program, Mallory Henry, showcases how families can create a supportive empowering environment while celebrating throughout the holiday season in this four part series.